Mark Elliot Graham
A Beloved Son

January 3, 1981 - December 23, 2023

Mark, our second child, was born in Bellefontaine, Ohio during my pastoral service to
the Belle Center, RPCNA congregation. He spent his first four years often playing quietly in my
study in the sunshine of the morning hours. A vivid memory haunts me of our family physician
showing us Mark's umbilical cord tied into a knot by his restlessness in the womb. I've often
revisited that memory, thinking that this was almost prophetic of his nearly 43 years of life. As
an infant when he struggled to calm his soul our kitten would hop into the crib, snuggling with
the baby and wonderfully settle him down in quiet rest.

During our move in December of 1984 to what would be a 13-year pastoral ministry in
Minneola, Kansas, at his persistent request, Mark and I sang Christmas carols over and over in
the U-Haul truck! These early years were spent under Mom's homeschooling instruction. His
artistic interests were awakened as he made poster-boards for our family's Psalm-singing
memory efforts. As a boy Mark loved to sing Psalms in Church worship. He could sing heartily,
loudly and joyfully!

He also did well in 4-H, little league baseball, and especially enjoyed model rocketry
with Dad who was project leader for several boys. Please browse our memory-table display in
the Quonset area and sign and comment, if you wish, in our memory book.
Mark was a gifted son and, even as a young boy, was possessed of an entrepreneurial
spirit. His first, major business venture was mowing yards in Minneola. Elder Reed Hindman
sold him a used riding mower and kindly trained him in mower maintenance. Mark paid him
with borrowed money from Grandpa Edwards, which he repaid dutifully. He later had a web
design business called Frontier Webs. Beginning in November, 2002, he cranked out website
templates for Pixel Mill, a web template company, receiving regular royalty payments for almost
four years. Check out the invoice he prepared for Rev. Dennis Prutow's The Sterling Pulpit &
Westminster Evangelistic Ministries. This week I found invoices and other mementos of such
business efforts, which usually suffered from failure to follow through for the long haul. He was
an extraordinarily apt sketch artist. I've placed some of them on the memory table. At age 14
he won correspondence art lessons by entering a drawing contest, but never finished the
course due to his aversion to structured instruction. And he was a gifted pianist, which he
sadly abandoned after his first and only recital.

Mark enjoyed hunting and exploring with his best friend, Samuel McKissick, a fellow
church member, who lived on a farm south of Minneola. Sam's father, Dr. McKissick, kindly
and generously provided a 4-H calf for Mark, which was a highlight of those halcyon days.
They could spend hours in their rural wonderland, even camping out overnight in the pasture
on the lookout for coyotes. Mark excitedly reported that one night a coyote charged them and
jumped right over them in their defensive dugout. On another, more infamous, occasion those
two friends found and feasted on wild onions! This, of course, was to their sisters' chagrin!
These girls were distressed by the happy boys' pungent odors for the remainder of the day,
especially in the closed quarters of our automobile.

Mark was an intelligent, gifted, sensitive soul with a life-long affliction of social anxieties
and increasing, tormenting, physical and mental health problems. Mark was a kinesthetic
learner. The traditional academic path was not for him. He was self-taught and even learned
computer programing languages. Alas, he was never able to launch a successful business
career. He dropped out of High School after one semester due to being sentenced to the
Juvenile Detention Center in Garden City, Kansas. During this month-long incarceration he not
only honed his criminal skill-set by acquaintance with fellow inmates, he earned his GED.
During his adult years he was increasingly plagued by "voices" in his head which seemed never
to give him respite for long.

It behoves me to emphasize that he was just ONE of our five, gratefully-cherished,
covenant children. Five, distinguished pastors who invested in our lives in various ways
baptized each of them. Rev. Stan Copeland baptized Mark as an infant in Ohio, but he never
made a profession of faith in the RP Church. Later, during a six-month, court-ordered stay in
San Diego, California in "New-Hope House," Mark became actively involved in a Baptist
Church, made a public profession of his faith in Christ and was baptized as a believer. Mind
you, it is not sacramental or ritual baptism, but Christ alone by Spiritual Baptism who
sovereignly saves as He wills. Living union with Christ is our only hope of peace with God and
everlasting life.

After he returned home to be with us again, he discovered that we had accepted a
pastoral call to Clay Center, Kansas where we labored for 18 years. The initial years there were
filled with great expectations. Sadly, however, it wasn't long before Mark was back into trouble.
In the summer and fall of 2016 we initiated and completed our move to Colorado
Springs. Gay and I have been blessed by our fellow Church members and many other friends
who have supported us, wept with us, and prayed with and for us faithfully. Our District 20
Transportation family has richly blessed us with a fulfilling work environment and, of course,
much laughter and joy as well! "A merry heart doeth good like a medicine!" WE THANK YOU
ALL for your love and friendship in Christ. We praise God! "Every good and perfect gift is from
above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due
to change." (James 1:17, KJV)

Mark was preceded in death by grandparents who loved him unconditionally as they
did all their grandchildren. His Uncle Joey also recently passed away. My brother, Joey, knew
well the anguish of mental illness in his own life.

I often reminded myself and others when Mark was center stage, unfairly stealing the
spotlight, "We have FOUR other, precious and beloved children in whom we delight with
pleasure beyond words; WORDS, which can never adequately express our immense pride and
joy in THEM!" At this moment we continue to thank our blessed, triune God for His "good and
perfect" living gifts of four beloved sons and four beloved daughters: Jes & Laurisa, Jeremiah &
Emily, Daniel & Anna and Samuel & Madi. I pray daily for each of you by name and for our ten,
delightful grandchildren: Justis, Lily, Knox & Kellen; Adelyn, Charlotte, sweet Lucia & Ezekiel;
Benjamin & Ceilidh. As our tribe increases and as long as I am of sound mind, I pledge to pray
for you, to love you and everyone who walks along side us during this pilgrim journey
heavenward; sharing the mundane and the breathtaking, mountain top experiences as well as
the deep darkness of the valleys of death. For each one of you and for all the saints and for
every dear friend, near and far, in the Apostle Paul's words, "I want you to know how great a
contest [in prayer] I have for you." (Colossians 2:1, ESV). MORE IMPORTANTLY, PLEASE
KNOW that "...we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our
infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come
boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of
need." (Hebrews 4:15 & 16, KJV)

GAY AND I THANK YOU FROM THE DEPTHS OF OUR HEARTS FOR BEING HERE
WITH US TODAY, WHETHER IN BODY OR IN SPIRIT!
Earlier this week our daughter, Emily, shared these words of encouragement from
Samuel Rutherford, a seventeenth-century Scottish pastor and theologian:

What God layeth on, let us suffer, for some have one cross, some seven, some ten, some half a
cross - yet all the saints have whole and full joy, and seven crosses have seven joys. Glorify the
Lord in your sufferings, and take his banner of love, and spread it over you. Others will follow
you, if they see you strong in the Lord; their courage shall take life from your Christian carriage.
The weightiest end of the cross of Christ that is laid upon you, lieth upon your strong Savior.

MAY GOD BLESS YOU ALL